Falling ...

I wake up recently in the night, open my eyes, look around and don't know where I am. My heart is pounding, mind full of fear, can't recognise the man lying next to me. The strangest feeling that comes back to me every few months. Insecurity, unhappiness, lonliness. The depth of dark thoughts, flushing my mind from inside. Then the burst of sheer joy lasting half a moment to disappear in the dark again. Loosing my balance, loosing the ground.

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